Quote Post

Some people post "quote posts" with really stirring, thoughtful quotes from ancient patriarchs and foreign dignitaries whose names are hard to pronounce. They tell us that Whatchamacallit Gandhi said "be the change you want to see in the world"—or was it John Waldo Emerson who said that? Or Ralph F. Kennedy?

Touching, regardless. Those kinds of quote posts are nice.

Really nice. Sweet.

But my quote posts are never touching or particularly inspiring.

They're not by famous people. The names are easy to pronounce. (i.e. "Scott". How can you mispronounce "Scott"?)

But!— they're funny. At least, they were funny when they happened, so they are fun to repost even if everyone reads them and thinks, "Whaaaa?"

After all, it's my blog, and I visit it more often than anybody else, so I'm entitled to post anything I want to. Right?

Come on, now, folks. Let's get some audience participation.

I'm entitled to post anything I want to. Right?

There. That's better. Thanks. *curtsy*

 

With that in mind, here are a few quotes:

 

Collin: It's not a touch-screen.

Scott: Yes, it is. It just doesn't do anything.

 

Scott [walks in the room]: As you were, men.

 

Jeff [smells my new perfume]: That's heavenly!

Roland [smells my new perfume, later]: What does it smell like in here? Lysol?

 

Don: Since you've started attending that church, has church membership gone up—all of those eligible guys following you around wanting to marry you?

 

Nancy [sees Mark after he got back from cooking for employees on vacation]: Hey, Chef Boy-ar-dee!

 

Nancy: I see she's cut her hair short this time. [She's gone through every phase under the sun….except cute.] And she can't help that.

 

Jeff: Mark Blair can ride with me. I have duct tape.

 

Scott: In Nevada, it's always about the girls and the silver.

 

Nancy: I'm going crazy. Do you want to go with me?

 

Scott [looking at the back of a Polaroid picture]: That's Hesperia at night.